When people talk about budgeting, they often refer to spreadsheets, savings goals, and cutting down on takeaways. But what happens when there’s nothing to budget? No
Today was one of the most difficult days.
I think the weight of reality hit me hard — like it had been building quietly in the background, just waiting for the chance to collapse on top of me. I try to stay optimistic. I manifest positivity. I speak life over my children, even when I feel like I’m falling apart. But today felt like a breaking point.
I spent my very last making breakfast for my girls, only for them to tell me it tasted like nothing. I smiled through it, told them to eat up, and didn’t say a word about how I hadn’t eaten myself. I’d given them everything we had left. We were out of food. Out of drinking water. My bank account sat at £0.68. No bin bags. No dinner plan. No real idea what I was going to do next.
After dropping my oldest off at school, my youngest turned to me and said she didn’t want to go back to the shelter — she wanted to go to her friend’s house. And I realised… it wasn’t just about playtime. It was about escape. She didn’t want to come back here. And I didn’t blame her.
That’s when the tears came. The kind you don’t even try to hide. I cried in the street because I felt like I was drowning. Like I was gasping for air and life just kept pushing my head back underwater.
I want so badly to be a good mother. But some days, I feel like I’m failing in every way.
When Budgeting Feels Impossible
Trying to budget without a stable income feels like trying to hold sand in your hands. With only £46 a week in child maintenance and £42 in child benefit, everything has to stretch: travel, food, toiletries, school supplies, clothing, entertainment — the list is endless.
Back when I had my first daughter, I had more family support. But time passes, people move on, and their priorities shift. They now have families of their own. They still help when they can, and I’m grateful — but it’s not the same as having a safety net you can always fall into.
And while their father does help, the support is very minimal. Out of everyone that I’ve come across I’d expect the other parent to understand where I’m coming from. He knows what it costs to raise our children — the school uniforms that always need replacing, the grocery bill that never stays down, the expense of maintaining two different hair textures (which means one hair store trip can cost £50 easily). I don’t expect miracles. But I do expect understanding and support that I don’t have to ask for.
Still, I’ve learned to do what I can with what I have.
The Scraps We Make Magic With
Living like this has taught me how to make a way where there is none. I’ve picked up a few strategies that help — even on the hardest weeks:
- Plan around what you have. Instead of dreaming about full grocery hauls, I use what’s in the cupboard and get creative. Beans and rice become dinner, leftover bread becomes breakfast, and soup can stretch for days.
- Find joy in the free. Walks, library visits, garden centres, local events. My kids don’t need fancy — they just need me present.
- Accept second-hand blessings. Charity shops, clothing swaps, Facebook Free groups — I’ve found clothes, toys, and even food this way. Humility is survival.
- Humour through the heaviness. Sometimes I joke, “If tears were currency, I’d be rich.” It might sound silly, but laughter is how I keep myself from falling apart.
- Lean into community. Whether it’s a kind neighbour, a local food bank, or a fellow mum I met online — saying yes to support has been life-changing.
✨ Reflection
There are days where I truly feel like I have nothing to show for the last 11 months. We’re still homeless. I haven’t built the stability I long for. But when I look at my daughters — their bright smiles, their prayers before bed, their belief in me — I realise something: they still see me. They still choose me.
And in their eyes, I am not failing. I’m showing up.
🌸 Affirmation
“I am doing the best I can with what I have. Even on the days that break me, I am still worthy of love, rest, and hope.”
The Comforting Mum 
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